OK. I’ve been compiling a list of funny doctors’ names. Yesterday I asked the help of some of my tweeps (friends on Twitter), so the list grew. The list is divided into three: (1) Interesting or kinda cool, (2) Specialty-name matches that are either funny or scary (especially those damn urologists), and (3) The No-Comment List. I have about 7 more that belong on the No-Comment List of Doctor names, but are way too far over the edge for me to post.

1 – Interesting or Kinda Cool Doctors’ names:

• Dr. Doctor
• Dr. Payne (there are lots of these)
• Dr. Blood
• Dr. Ricketts
• Dr. Stump
• Dr. Croke
• Dr. Killie
• Dr. Poke

2 – Funny specialty-name matches that are either funny or scary:

• Dr. Love (cardiologist)
• Dr. Schpritz (urologist)
• Dr. Di(ana) Mort (oncologist)
• Dr. Plack (cardiologist)
• Dr. Slaughter (surgeon)
• Dr. Zipper (urologist)
• Dr. Moorkath (cardiologist… it’s all about the procedures, baby)
• Dr. Klutz (surgeon)
• Dr. Fingers (gynecologist)
• Dr. Richard Chopp (urologist… don’t believe me? click the link)
• Dr. Blinder (ophthalmologist)
• Dr. Nudelman (urologist)
• Dr. Butt (gastroenterologist)
• Dr. Redwood (urologist… no, not a veterinary urologist… get your mind outta the gutter)

3 – The No-Comment Doctors’ Names List:

• Dr. Young-Hyman
• Dr. Fatterpaker

Thanks again for all of your contributions. Here’s an article from American Medical News with some names I didn’t list and with more info about Dr. Richard Chopp’s marketing efforts. Dr. Chopp, if you happen to read this, I’d love to interview you for our GiggleMed Medical Humor Blog readers.

Get medical humor, nursing jokes, funny doctor stories, and health care bloopers by following @GiggleMed on Twitter. You can “follow” these funny micro-blog posts whenever and how ever you want. Here are some sample posts:

Follow GiggleMed and Get Chart Farts® on Twitter. Signing up for Twitter is free. Join now by clicking on this “Follow ME on Twitter” icon below:

Here’s a sample from GiggleMed’s funny list of Things You Should Never Say to a Pregnant Woman

• You might want to get off of that thing, I think there’s weight limit
• Did you ever see Alien?
• I see swollen people
• I’m sure you’re having a boy… Women become much more beautiful when they’re having girls
• When can I come by for the placenta?
• Pregnant?! How did that happen?
• For you, the puffy and edematous look is quite becoming.
• You really shouldn’t complain so much… There are some species of salamanders that can remain pregnant for up to 38 months.
• Are you sure you’re only nine months pregnant?
• It is amazing how closely your ankles resemble the trunk of this one tree in my front yard.
• I’ll betcha I can hold my urine longer than you
• It looks like you only have one more month to go
• Yeah, but it’s a good kind of fat
• As soon as you give birth, these are the days you’ll miss
• Did you see that documentary on elephant seals last night?
• So… you must be having twins
• Did they say it was human?
• It was an inney before, wasn’t it?

Got more? Post them in the comments below.

OK, so my wife is pregnant with #5. But, I have learned a lot since #1…

When we were med students, I made a comment that I thought she’d find funny. We were walking up a steep hill in the middle of Pennsylvania (an area I affectionately refer to as Pennsyltucky). My wife was 8 and a half months pregnant and visibly getting winded as we neared the top of the hill. I waited patiently… but waiting and silence, for me, is usually a bad combo. It’s usually a time that I try to make a joke – but not ideal because invariably, that’s a time when jokes are forced (and not spontaneous).

Nonetheless, I offered a point worthy of deep reflection… “Yeah, I know it must be tough, but at least we’re not salamanders. Apparently, some salamanders have a gestation period of up to 38 months.”

It didn’t go over well.

So, this time, with #5, I decided to get her some maternity humor gifts that I made with her in mind. No salamander references, though. (Click on the image if you know someone who might like these)

Here’s a sample from GiggleMed’s list of Things You Should Never Say to a Pregnant Woman:

• You might want to get off of that thing, I think there’s weight limit
• Did you ever see Alien?
• I see swollen people
• I’m sure you’re having a boy… Women become much more beautiful when they’re having girls
• When can I come by for the placenta?

I’ll post more in a few days. Got ideas? Post them in the comments section.

There are lots of things that leave you thinking, “TMI” when reading some tweets from the world of Twitter. And that’s fine… you wanna post something on Twitter, fine. Just do us all a favor and spare us these 21 Things You Should Never Tweet About Your Health:

• Your favorite urine sample flavor
• Ways you conned your doctor out of paying your copay
• Requests for more narcotics
• Your sputum quality index
• Your latest spot on the Bristol Stool Chart
• Mechanical home remedies for hemorrhoids (with or without step-by-step instructions)
• All of the reasons you enjoy kidney stone pain
• Stories of your favorite colonoscopy experience
• All of the things that fascinate you about boils and carbuncles
• A list of your favorite hospital odors and the source of their nostalgia
• The prevailing theories on why you get recurrent rectal abscesses
• Links to Flikr photos of the lesions you discovered in your armpit
• Your first thoughts upon tasting that drainage from your tooth abscess
• Your six favorite ways to conserve your use of underwear
• The Flikr photo of that abdominal CT scan where they discovered your role in that smuggling cartel
• A running list of all of the goodies you found in hospital dumpsters
• Links to those prostatectomy videos that you posted on YouTube
• How stupid you felt when you applied that suppository without first removing the foil packaging
• That you think your wife’s cooking should go into a biohazard bag
• The real etiology of your “spider bite”
• The 7 nifty uses you found for keeping your pinky fingernail so long

Do you want a nicer PDF version of this list? Right click and choose “Save As”:

==> Funny Twitter Tips from GiggleMed.com <==

Got some more to add to the list? Post them in the comments below or shoot us an email… or even better, tweet it after you join Twitter…

Follow GiggleMed and Get Chart Farts® on Twitter:

Imagine a FaceBook or a MySpace that centers around a theme you enjoy… You obviously find health care humor amusing or you wouldn’t be on this page, reading this post. GiggleMed.com is dedicated to relieving stress and burnout for health professionals through the use of humor. But why should you just wait for us to make something funny? You can add to the medical humor world yourself, by posting stuff you find funny or interesting. Here’s how…

It’s GiggleMed’s Medical Humor Social Network through a service called Ning. Here’s how it works. You join for free, choose a user name, and then start building you page/profile with easy-peasy built-in widgets.

You can set up a fully customizable profile with a funny photo, some basic information and everything you’ve contributed to the network. Your “friends” within the medical humor network can subscribe to your material and posts. Or they can just browse your profile and see what you found funny.

You can create groups inside of the social network around hobbies, interests, affinities, geographical locations and more. Imagine the fun you can have with old nursing school buddies, medical school friends, colleagues within your residency program, or other workers in your hospital.

You can get people talking. Start a discussion on any topic and watch other members respond with posts, photos and attachments.

Upload original footage or share videos from popular video services like YouTube, Google Video and Vimeo. You can see GiggleMed videos here before they are released to the public. And you can post your own. No complex scripts to learn, no programming languages to sift through… all easy clicks to have your friends laughing.

Find more videos like this on Medical Humor

You can post photos and organize them into albums. You can show off your photos in galleries or slideshows.

Find more photos like this on Medical Humor

You can use a Medical Humor “network badge” to display your stuff on your MySpace profile, blog or website. And you can share photos, videos and music from the social network on your Facebook profiles.

View my page on Medical Humor

It’s a lot of fun… join today.

StumbleUpon is a social bookmarking tool that can be a lot of fun. You can install a “stumble” button into the menu of your internet browser. Whenever you click, you will be sent to a web site that either fits the categories you pre-selected as topics you are interested in, or you will be sent to a web site that your friends have flagged as interesting.

GiggleMed is on StumbleUpon. And as we go through sites that we find funny or weird, we flag them. (I give it a “thumbs up.”) You can choose to “stumble” through the sites GiggleMed.com has given a thumbs up or you can go to GiggleMed’s StumbleUpon page and see which sites they are.

Also, if you happen to like one of the posts on this blog, go ahead and give it a thumbs up. You can also review it and post comments for other “stumblers”.

If you have any sites you think we should comment on or stumble, let us know. And if you join StumbleUpon, then tag GiggleMed as a friend.

This is a legitimate scale for stool quality

I take no issue with describing stool quality for medical purposes. I take no issue with graphic representation of those qualities. And, I take no issue with creating a scale for easier communication between doctors, nurses, and other health care providers.

I do, however, take issue with the fact that it reads like a breakfast menu…

Sources:

Lewis SJ, Heaton KW (1997), “Stool form scale as a useful guide to intestinal transit time”, Scand. J. Gastroenterol. 32(9): 920–4, PMID 9299672

“Constipation Management and Nurse Prescribing: The importance of developing a concordant approach” (PDF).

Wikipedia: Bristol Stool Scale

SCOE 10X – The Odor Eliminator – for Types 2 through 6 :)